28.4.11

Platonic relationships.....

 Well, to most of the folks, once they are engaged or married, it's sort of 'forbidden' to be friends with the opposite sex. Jealously usually crept in whenever one spotted going out or dined with his/her friend. One of my ex-lady colleague and now good friend, who always lunched with me, never tell her boyfriend for fear of his jealousy. I find it's really up to the individual as well as the comfort level of their spouse to have a platonic friendship. It's even difficult to befriend someone of the opposite sex once you are married.
Agent Scully and Mulder in X-Files ....

To me, I do maintained friendships (or rather platonic) with a two ladies friends, despite we all got married. Well, I know them when we were still single, went out, lunched or dined together in a group before or just the two of us sometimes, for a movie. I still lunched with them now regularly as well as we chatted on the phone to catch up. We usually never failed to talk about our family relationships, work, life problems and etc, just like any other good friends. Once, I was surprise to find out too I am the only guy friend for one of my lady friends! She told me besides her boyfriend (now husband), I'm the next guy she hang out with...hahaha! The catching ups are usually fun and never-ending!


I find that it's great to hear the opinions of the fairer sex sometimes especially when it comes to certain issues especially on relationship or parenting. And, on their end, they would welcome advices on guys thingy like cars, gadgets, sports and etc. Sometimes I do seek their advices if I wanna get something for my wife and they do gave lots and lots of ideas. I remember one of my friend even accompany me to buy a present!
 
On the other hand to be on the 'safe' side, it's always better not to meet up too regularly while maintaining the friendship. As for me, I usually catch up once in two or three months. I guess platonic relationship exists... at least for me.

You guys have a nice long weekend, wind down and relax!

14 comments:

  1. well, i guess some ppl prefer to keep it from their bf/gf/spouse to know to avoid long winding explanation which usually leads to arguments.

    I have friends whom into the same situation...and i had lost contact with 2 of the guy friends whom used to be very close me because of the same reason (their gf/fiancee). *sigh*

    ReplyDelete
  2. Well, I think it's okay la to keep in touch with friends of opposite gender. As long as we don't do anything out of the boundary lo... hehe :P
    Yea, wishing you a happy holiday!

    ReplyDelete
  3. platonic friendship is great if we know the limit.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hi Chris, its good have friends with no ulterior motives.
    My wife always encourage me buy her lady friends drinks...or lunch.
    Only I now age caught up feel lazy to go out.
    I have many lady friends....my wife knows all of them. No problems. Matter of understanding.
    Have a nice day.
    Lee.

    ReplyDelete
  5. As long as the intention is good and clear from both sides and i think it is cool to have opposite sex good friend..

    get to the other half of your friend too, let him see you first,,, and i am very sure he will be pleased with you .........

    have a great weekend and god bless

    ReplyDelete
  6. I haven't got a chance to even go for a drink with old mates, guess I am just overload with house chaos, kids and work.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Yes, platonic friendships can happen between male and female... good that you have such nice friends.. but some might misunderstand in the long run...

    ReplyDelete
  8. Angel - Well, I guess it's not permanent. Sooner or later, the relationship will be weaker and weaker till lost contact, especially when family commitments between both parties gets more.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Uncle Lee - I am sure you have lots of platonic friendships than most of us here. Thanks for sharing and yes, no other ulterior motives except friendship.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Eugene - hahaha..the best way is to bring both spouses out and have family outings together!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Agnes - Well, you really need a break! Start calling your old friends and have a coffee with them!

    ReplyDelete
  12. reanaclaire - Yes but still I find that these friendship won't last forever. For example, one of my lady friend now was pregnant and I'm sure I won't see her so often soon due to her maternal duties.

    ReplyDelete
  13. at times i do feel sorry for people who only have friends of he same sex..or maybe to be exact, can only go out with people of the same sex. But then again, it;s not for me to comment as long as they are fine with that. yes, you're right, the married ones are usaully hard to catch up!

    ReplyDelete